SampsonHemp

Here I stand. I can do no other.

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Celebratory Solstice by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

Celebratory Solstice

Quiet nights Summer flights And the moon alone looks down. Watching out With a silent pout And the moon alone looks down. Half the ocean Covered in white As the moon alone looks down; And Pleiades bright Till morning’s end And the moon alone looks down. Solstice time leads to dreams of dust And the blazing moon shines down To those of us With open eyes… And the moon’s sweet glory burns.

Tales of the Aspiring Artist by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

Tales of the Aspiring Artist

Canvas and Paper are by far the most horrific things in the world. Consider their relation to their content. A block of stone potentially contains anything the artist can release. To carve a dog, simply carve away anything that doesn’t look like a dog. Wood works the same way. But Canvas and Paper taunt the author. Blank, white emptiness. White holds all of the colors of the rainbow; why can painters not simply paint away the excess colors, wipe the oils off of the canvas to reveal the masterpiece below? Scarce, dry sheets. Paper glares with its blinding nothing, daring the author to fill it. Can you do it? Not I. Far too dangerou

The Doom as Foretold By The Meme by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

The Doom as Foretold By The Meme

Not as funny as it seems on first sight. The most frightening prospect in the world. Horror incarnate, Hell on Earth. Can you imagine? Even begin to imagine? Imagine sitting on your couch, watching life go by Knowing that outside your fogged-up window People are meeting Touching Kissing Lovers are laughing Bonding Glowing Knowing each other better than words Imagine the sheer pain of realizing that your place in the cosmos Is destined to be the agony of the misunderstood, the outcast, Abandoned by all who were meant to care. Man was not meant to be alone; That is why God invented love. To be alone Without someone to love or to reciproc

Some Collected Thoughts by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

Some Collected Thoughts

Fantastic, beautiful shadows Star-lit, awe-inspiring Come to take your breath away. Don't let them in They make rather poor guests The rules of hospitality matter, but not here. The unfathomable beaches Hard as diamonds, brittle as cast-iron Strike it just the right way, and it shatters. Spitting dark-eyes Dream-swollen drinking Moonbeams on a stem-like stalk. Face your maker, little man You're everything you could have been, And all of your own accord. Set the rafts away, harbormaster The dreams will flow faster yet More difficult to follow than ever before. Slinky, silky mice and rats Cream of the crops, all eaten away, Bourgeois of t

The Cynical Scientist's Simplified Version by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

The Cynical Scientist's Simplified Version

Sparkle, sparkle, gigantic ball of flaming gas How I wonder whether you are simply a pocket of nuclear fusion and fission pulled together into an enormous, gravitationally held ball of fire or if you are in fact a white hole (the opposite of a black hole), spewing cosmic energy into our universe from an entirely different one Positioned as you are many millions of light-years above us in relation to our frame of reference, although in fact one can have no directions in space, which is theoretically gravity-free, at least on the planet scale Similar to the color spectrum of a crushed, condensed mass of super-dense and nigh-unbreakable carbo

The Things I've Learned Since... by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

The Things I've Learned Since...

What poetry I used to make Smiling at the wind and sun Laughing with the moon. Now my days are spent in boxes Carrying burdens belonging to other people I feel like a mailman. They say that opportunities abound But doesn’t that include opportunities for failure? Tread carefully, my son. Still, hardships are what make diamonds out of carbon And two doors open with every one that closes. So stick your foot in that door, lad You won’t go far wrong. Dreams have little significance During the daytime Keep your head down, your nose clean, Don’t toe the line. Chords that are in disharmony can sometimes mean the most. Behind

Crossed Interests, Part 2 by SampsonHemp, literature

Crossed Interests, Part 1 by SampsonHemp, literature

Adventures With Norman! Part 2 by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

Adventures With Norman! Part 2

Adventures With Norman! Part 2 For some reason, I’m not lynched for having wrote the last one, so I’ll give you a second one! Here, have some more two-minute adventures with Norman! I woke up to find Norman staring at me. That wouldn’t have been as much of a problem if he hadn’t also been about three inches away from my face. “Gah!” I screamed, crabbing away backwards on my hands. “What the hell, dude!?” He continued to stare. “I like to watch people sleep.” “Not like that’s creepy or anything, but… but that’s really effing creepy, Norman!ȁ

Adventures With Norman! Part 1 by SampsonHemp, literature

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Celebratory Solstice by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

Celebratory Solstice

Tales of the Aspiring Artist by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

Tales of the Aspiring Artist

The Doom as Foretold By The Meme by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

The Doom as Foretold By The Meme

Some Collected Thoughts by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

Some Collected Thoughts

The Cynical Scientist's Simplified Version by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

The Cynical Scientist's Simplified Version

The Things I've Learned Since... by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

The Things I've Learned Since...

Crossed Interests, Part 2 by SampsonHemp, literature

Crossed Interests, Part 1 by SampsonHemp, literature

Adventures With Norman! Part 2 by SampsonHemp, literature

Literature

Adventures With Norman! Part 2

Adventures With Norman! Part 1 by SampsonHemp, literature

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Vampire, Werewolf, Exorcist, and a Tofu Sandwich by SampsonHemp, literature

Vampire, Werewolf, Exorcist, and a Tofu Sandwich

SampsonHemp

About SampsonHemp

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Artist // Hobbyist // Literature

Mar 24
United States
Deviant for 12 years
He / Him

Badges

Whiskers: Submitted to the April Fools' Day category

My Bio

Many thanks to Albatrossed for the Sampson icon, and many more to Oxiemoron for the fabulous portrait above!

I'm a writer who enjoys looking for interesting photograph opportunities, though as I lack any sort of photoshop and my camera is meant to be a video camera, most of my pictures are not wonderful. I typically write either about Sampson's universe, which is constantly being clarified and expanded, or seemingly random poetry usually about nothing in particular. But that doesn't answer the question.

I'm a dude with many interests and hobbies, most of which are considered cool, but few of which are marketable. I greatly enjoy cats and small furry creatures (My cats like those too!) and camping in the semi-wilderness. Among my many skills are such things as an occasionally fantastic and varied vocabulary, a perfectly odd sense of humor, and a rather irritating moral sense of right and wrong (which I try not to follow too often). I enjoy philisophical quandries and logic puzzles, but not for too long or my attention span starts wandering. Thank ye kindly, Deviant-type people!

Favourite Visual Artist

All of my friends on DeviantArt!

Favourite Movies

Pirates of the Caribbean-The Curse of the Black Pearl & Serenity

Favourite TV Shows

Firefly, Avatar: The Last Airbender

Favourite Bands / Musical Artists

The Script, Enya, Green Day, pretty much any soundtrack ever,

Favourite Books

The Urban Magic series, specifically The Minority Council

Favourite Writers

Jim Butcher, Terry Pratchet, Kate Griffin, Robert Frost

Favourite Games

Halo: The Entire Series, Okami

Favourite Gaming Platform

XBox 360

Tools of the Trade

Words words words words words!

Other Interests

Cats, fire, flaming cats, cats armed with flamethrowers, cats in Spartan MJOLNIR Armor armed with flamethrowers, webcomics

Posts

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SampsonHemp

Jun 18, 2013

Ay Caramba

0 min read

8,054 unseen submissions. I leave for a few months and this is what happens. Oy vey. I hope to be writing much more than I have been previously and submitting later this summer. Thank you to anyone who has not forgotten I exist.

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SampsonHemp

Jan 14, 2013

Yeah, that didn't happen at all.

0 min read

I have such lulz at my own business, I can't begin to describe. :C Anyway. Very little of my various projects have gotten anything done on them at all, and I've actually dropped back to planning stages on one of them. I'm really sorry about this, and I do hope to rectify this. Shortly my workload will allow for much more fun-projects and less of the work-projects, so... YAY!

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SampsonHemp

Oct 19, 2012

Right, then. News.

0 min read

First thing: New material and work should be done by mid-next week, so stay tuned. Hopefully I can post something new every day, but I can't be sure about that yet. Second thing: Thanks to all few of you who still are here- it's been challenging for several weeks to write at all, let alone anything interesting or fun. But new stuff will certainly still be coming. Third thing: This latest New Stuff will be some backstory and hype. Keep an eye on my page for exciting stories and possibly an interview with Sampson on how physics and magic are comparable!